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Joe Biden Cuddle Studio Franchising Opportunity

Biden Cuddles
CHQ readers of a certain age will recall that once upon a time Arthur Murray and Fred Astaire dance studios were a fixture of every city and suburb. Staffed by debonair gentlemen and well-coiffed ladies, the dance studios taught post-WWII America the social graces associated with ballroom and Latin dancing, as well as the steps themselves.

The dance studios also served as sort of unofficial lonely-hearts clubs where those who yearned for the human contact that dancing provides could find a partner or enjoy the refined company of one of the instructors.

While the popularity of the dance studios has waned in recent decades, the alienation driven by our post-modern technological society has driven more Americans to seek the commercial forms of human contact dancing instruction used to provide.

One of the businesses that has emerged to meet the demands of this market is the cuddle studio.

Operating under such names as Cuddle Pros, Cuddle Up To Me and Cuddle Therapy cuddle studios advertise they provide nourishment for the soul through laughter, compassionate listening, and above all else, an incredible grounding energy. “You will leave feeling like you can truly breathe again,” advertises one West Coast operation.

According to a recent article in the Fort Myers, Florida, News-Press Cuddle Pros “offers professional cuddling services and platonic friendship sessions at an hourly rate.”

For $85 an hour, reported Jennifer Beeson, you can be snuggled on a comfortable bed by a professional who will spoon you and play with your hair. It's up to the client if talking is involved.

“A lot of people think it’s weird and think touch is a negative thing, like it’s so taboo,” said Genesis Burroughs, owner of The Cuddle Pros. “But we’re human and people need that interaction.”

There is even a professional cuddler certification process.

However, the competition in the nascent cuddling industry is about to become even fiercer with the entry of a new market-maker: The Joe Biden Cuddle Studio franchise operation.

With over 30-years in the cuddling business, the Biden operation is the clear 800 lb. gorilla in the cuddling industry, in part because of the cachet of having the former Vice President’s name associated with the studios, but also because the Biden franchise offers unique proprietary products, such as hair sniffing, that are not available through outlets limited by the traditional boundaries of the certified professional cuddlers at the other studios.

Moreover, the Biden operation boasts a list of prestige clients, such as former Nevada Democratic lieutenant governor nominee Lucy Flores, Stephanie Carter, the wife of former Defense Secretary Ashton Carter, actress Eva Longoria, Maggie Coons, the daughter of Sen. Christopher A. Coons,  Amy Lappos, a former congressional aide for U.S. representative Jim Himes, D.J. Hill, Caitlyn Caruso, young Democratic staffer Ally Coll, sexual assault survivor Sofie Karasek, White House intern Vail Kohnert-Yount, and former Biden Senate staffer Alexandra Tara Reade, to name but a few of Joe Biden’s more high-profile public cuddles.

Beyond its stable of high-profile clients, there is no tougher competitor in in the cuddling businesses, and they are not afraid to push the boundaries, especially in the growth-limiting area of consent.

While other cuddlers may find their growth opportunities limited by the cuddlers’ canon, which includes an extensive curriculum regarding consent, the former Vice President has proven that he is no Teddy Bear, but the toughest competitor in the cuddling field.

Even when called-out for skirting the limits of the industry’s self-imposed standards, Joe Biden refuses to apologize for his well-documented history of groping, kissing, and pawing at women and children. Why? Because Joe says he had no ill intentions when he touched people without their consent.

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