One of my favorite songs from the country/rock group formerly known as Lady Antebellum is titled “Something ‘Bout a Woman.”
(note: During the “woke” purge of 2020, the band members dropped the word “Antebellum” as it referenced a period of American history with slavery and was henceforth deemed insensitive. They now call themselves simply Lady A.)
The lyrics open like this: “Well there's something 'bout a woman
with my t-shirt on
hair in her eyes, no make-up on
standin there smilin with my coffee cup
yeah there's somethin 'bout a woman that's easy to love”
I enjoy the song because it reminds me so much of the women in my life. It’s a simple tune, not complicated, not nuanced, not overly flattering nor understated, yet captures the qualities that makes every woman unique. And special.
In saying so, I probably would be unceremoniously mocked by the contemporary angry liberal “woke” crowd as old-fashioned, socially backwards and maybe even a little bigoted for harboring wholesome thoughts about adult female human beings. Up until last week, I always thought nearly everyone would define “woman” as something like: a fully developed female member of the Homo genus, species sapiens; not a man; or, bipedal human with female genitalia and the capacity to bear children.
Any one of these crude, non-scientific definitions would probably suffice for most people to recognize that I was referring to a woman. Or, you could simply listen to Lady Antebellum’s song referenced above and get the gist on your own. If there was an alien visiting from outer space (like in the classic 80’s movie, Starman), he, she or “it” could look to any number of sources to learn about what a “woman” is. This is a pretty basic concept in every culture I’m aware of. Kids realize at an early age that mom is a woman and dad is a man. At least that’s the way it used to be.
That’s why it was so shocking last week when senile president Joe Biden’s nominee for the Supreme Court seat of retiring Justice Stephen Breyer, Ketanji Brown Jackson (hereafter known as KBJ), could not answer when asked by Tennessee Republican Senator Marsha Blackburn to define “woman”.
KBJ simply replied “I can’t”. She added, “I’m not a biologist.” Such a glaring oversight will bring more problems for a Democrat party that’s already facing enough obstacles ahead of this year’s midterm elections. Byron York described the exchange at the Washington Examiner:
“It was an amazing moment, and a terrible one for Jackson. You have to be a biologist to know what a woman is? Who would say that? Perhaps Jackson could see, in the seconds she had to consider the question, that the whole topic was a minefield for a nominee backed by the progressive legal community. What about all those transgender activists? What would they say? Better to punt and suggest that only a biologist can really know what a woman is.
“Blackburn was ready for Jackson's dodge. ‘So you believe the meaning of the word 'woman' is so unclear and controversial that you can't give me a definition?’ she asked. ‘Senator, in my work as a judge, what I do is I address disputes,’ Jackson explained. ‘If there's a dispute about a definition, people make arguments, and I look at the law, and I decide, so I'm not — ‘
“’The fact that you can't give me a straight answer about something so fundamental as what a woman is underscores the danger of the kind of progressive education that we are hearing about,’ Blackburn responded. Her point was made.”
Yes indeed. In any sane society, KBJ’s nomination application would be tossed out and she would be unceremoniously returned to her previous lifetime appointment-protected position as a Washington DC circuit federal Appeals Court Judge. Granted it’s been a while since the senate formally voted down a presidential pick for the high bench, but this one certainly deserves the treatment.
But we’re not here to talk about whether KBJ will be confirmed later this week or next. Democrats couldn’t care less if she were as dumb as a doornail -- just as long as she’s blood sisters with fist waving, institution destroying, history bending leftist activists, they want her on the Court, dangit! For what it’s worth, KBJ seems plenty intelligent; one would have to be pretty sharp to say something so asinine and still sound convincing. If you don’t believe it, ask Senator Cory Booker for his opinion. Now there’s an idiot for ya!
This whole episode was absurd. If there is no technical meaning for a man and a woman, doesn’t it shoot the Democrats’ whole argument for insisting that America needs “diversity” and there’s such a thing as a “glass ceiling” preventing women from rising in their careers? Couldn’t it be argued that transgender swimmer William “Lia” Thomas shattered his/her own “ceiling” as the first male-born human being to win a women’s NCAA championship?
Where does this end? Won’t young male tennis players who can’t hope to compete with the likes of future GOAT(s) in the mold of Rafael Nadal, Novak Djokovic and Roger Federer simply switch genders after puberty, don a tennis skirt and start serving and volleying with the self-identifying ladies? There are a lot of great women tennis players out there, but they wouldn’t be able to challenge most biological men at the highest levels of the sport. That’s nature, folks.
One can’t help but deduce that all of this “who’s a woman?” or “who’s a man?” nonsense started this century when homosexual rights groups sued entities such as the Boy and Girl Scouts of America demanding that gay men be allowed to lead troops, or that biological women should be permitted to lead packs of boy scouts. Forget about tradition and common sense, the organizations themselves apparently had no say over who gets to do what. Some “woke” judge somewhere decided and now look at the mess we’re in.
This is yet another example of the proverbial camel inching his nose under the tent and not stopping until he’s taken over the whole thing. Seriously, how long will it be until the Chinese reckon that they can dominate women’s Olympic events in practically all categories by ordering -- on pain of imprisonment or “disappearance” -- that certain boys begin hormone therapy to become girls? Think they won’t do it? Didn’t East Germans find a way to cheat? The Russians too?
This is the new path for the genetics benders to maneuver around rules to get gold medals. You heard it here first.
The world’s gone stupid, and all of us are complicit in letting it get this bad. It all seemed so innocuous and freakish last decade when Bruce Jenner revealed that he really thought of himself as a she, started calling himself “Caitlyn” and the liberal media world embraced the transitioning man into the realm of women. Remember? They even gave Jenner his/her own TV documentary, “Call me Caitlyn” and then a TV show “I Am Cait” for a couple seasons. Here's a description of one of the episodes, called “Family Interference”: “Candis invites Cait over for an all-girl sleep over; Kim and Khloe [Kardashian] discuss comments aimed at Cait's ex, their mother, in her Vanity Fair article; later, Cait visits a support group for families with children that are transitioning.” For what it’s worth, “Caitlyn” is okay with his/her daughters calling him dad while he’s dressed in drag (okay, a dress) and painted up like a bargain basement streetwalker on Hollywood Boulevard.
Who watches this crap? Apparently Judge KBJ didn’t, or perhaps she would have had a better idea of what the definition of a woman is. It’s not really all that tough, is it? One would speculate that, if given the chance, someone in the media will soon ask senile Joe to define “woman” himself. We can’t say for sure how he would concoct an answer, but the deliberations could look like this:
--Since she was in the neighborhood, Hillary Clinton decided to drop by her old stomping grounds, the White House, to pay a visit to bosom buddy president senile Joe Biden to swap stories of illegitimate grandchildren and political conquests. It’s never been reported whether Hillary’s clan actually has any illegitimate grandkids, but with Big Bubba Bill as a hubby and him patrolling the brothels and halls of Democrat enclaves like a predator on a hunt, it would make sense!
Who knows, maybe Bubba Bill taught Hunter Biden everything the man knows about exploitation!
Upon entering the Oval Office, Hillary announced herself cheerfully, “Hey, Joe, how’s it hangin’? I’m down in Washington for a secret meeting at DNC headquarters to talk about the 2024 election -- whoops! wasn’t supposed to mention anything about that! -- and thought I’d chat with you about what a ‘woman’ is, since there seems to be some confusion about it lately.”
The president greeted his fellow former Obama administration alum with a puzzled expression, not immediately recognizing the woman’s maniacal facial features and crooked grin. “Oh, yeah, Hill, sure. I like talking about women. All the time, in fact. I like sniffing their hair and caressing their shoulders and huggin’ ‘em and kissin’ ‘em and gettin’ in their faces. And swimmin’ nude in front of ‘em, too. If anyone should know what a woman is, it’s me!
“Of course, I’ll leave the biology/anatomy lesson to your man Bill. Those days with Jeffrey Epstein -- who did not kill himself -- on the ‘Lolita Express’… well, he reacquainted himself with women in all stages of physical development. I’m jealous,” Biden said wistfully.
Hillary let the insult pass as though she hadn’t even heard it. ‘Today’s not the day to pick a pissing match with this old goat over what qualifies as a woman. There are more important fish to fry,’ she thought, determined to stay on message.
“Speaking of Bill, we’re handling a real pickle, Joe, pardon the pun,” Hillary continued. “Last week your girl Ketanji Brown Jackson said in front of the whole world that she couldn’t define what a ‘woman’ is. That’s cool, I get it. You get it too. If not, go ask Dr. Jill or Jen Psaki, and they’ll tell ya what you need to know about underwires and feminine products and rage and hormones and finishing/charm school and cheerleading and all that good stuff.
“Besides, wouldn’t a non-biologist examining a human still know if it was a woman or not?
Hillary went on, “But Peter Doocy or some other rightwing conspiracy-inspired nutjob member of the conservative press corps will be itching to ask you how you personally would define ‘woman’, and I want you to be prepared for the tasteless interrogation. Let’s face it, Joe, most of the time when you take unscripted questions you react like you were just startled awake from a nap at a care facility bingo night. You gotta get this one right or we might lose a hundred and fifty House seats this November instead of just 100.”
Biden paused as he considered what HRC was saying. ‘Define ‘woman’? That shouldn’t be too hard! I’ll just say it’s someone who looks like a dog faced pony soldier, and they’ll leave me alone.’
“Okay, Hill, I’m open to using your definition of woman when queried by the hateful stooges. What have you got in mind?”
Hillary got up from her seat and closed the office door so no one could hear their conversation, then resumed her chair. “We’re in a bind with this, Joe. Take it seriously. If you said being a ‘woman’ had anything to do with the traits you’re born with or your DNA or innate characteristics of humanity -- we lose the entirety of the LGBTQ vote and most of the audience of ‘The View’ on any given day.
“Further, our rabid abortion-loving feminist backers are watching, too. Sooner or later Planned Parenthood will beg Congress for federal funding for transgender men’s abortions. We can’t risk it. We’ve got to play along with the fakery. This is your ‘Emperor’s Clothes’ moment, Joe.
“You’ve got to pretend like KBJ did, and say there’s no such thing as a definition of ‘woman’. Say you married Dr. Jill because she lit your fancy as a human, not because she was a smokin’ hot babe of a woman who conveniently babysat your boys at the right time. Don’t be a dunce.”
Joe looked perplexed again. “You mean to tell me that I can’t define ‘woman’ in front of the country? They already think I’m senile and on my way to an early checkout from carrying a full load. And you want me to say I can’t define ‘woman’ now too???? They’ll kick me out of the White House. Kamala will finally stop cackling all the time. Hunter will quit his painting business and take up smoking crack again.
“It’d be political suicide.”
Hillary snorted uncontrollably as she suddenly leaped to her feet and breathlessly uttered, “Uh, excuse me, Joe, I gotta go to the bathroom. Can I go into the Oval Office library and use the one in there? I’ve always wanted to revisit the place where Bill and Monica did their thing. Gotta go! Toodleloo!”
However senile Joe handles the “I can’t define woman” controversy, he and his fellow Democrats will end up losers. The American public sees woke-ness in action and voters aren’t likely to be open to the liberal party’s lack of clarity on basic gender and culture questions. The 2022 midterm elections couldn’t get here fast enough.
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